Sunday, November 12, 2006

Now I'm wondering whether the doctor is right. I answered the phone today at work, the lady on the other end had a voice like a knife, and my ear started right up hurting again. The notion of going through life with permanent hearing loss (OK, so I got a little upset) really pissed me off....especially since there really isn't anythign I can do about it. How could I prove it? Without a test before the incident, there's nothing to compare it's current state to. I have no real way of proving (even if an appreciable effect could be proven) the source of the damage as being the balloon incident. I can't afford to do anything about it. In short, I'm a nothing, and because I'm a nothing, she can get away with having fucked up my ear, if it is in fact damaged. The whole thing just makes me furious, in the sense of a white rage that all but blinds my vision (literally). She had no right....

I mean, OK...trying to calm down here....if it's just my jaw, then why does it hurt whenever I hear a sharp, shrill, or loud noise, and only in that ear, and for an extended period of time afterwards?

I am upset. I wear glasses, have a bum hip, Asperger's, teeth going bad, but one thing I did have was very sharp hearing. I guess I've still got my IQ and keen sense of smell. :sigh:

Alright, alright....I will TRY hard not to obsess about this anymore......

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