And, I am still struggling with the residual unhappiness regarding the guy I got all broken up over 2+ years ago because he wouldn't speak or look at me. No matter how you cut it, it hurts to feel contaminated and anathema, but the fact of the matter is that somehow, it hurts more when I also am living 30 minutes away from the man who stood by me while I was putting the pieces back together. In other words: dealing with the physical distance and reduced facetime with my lover is made less easy by also being confronted with painful memories that still haven't been resolved. Yuck.