My brain is not at all rational when it gets triggered or upset. In fact, it is downright self destructive in that state. I am always upset and embarrased with myself once I come to my senses again, and swear that I will try to keep a better grip on reality next time, but unfortunately, PTSD is not very susceptible to willpower. The only way to beat this is going to be through therapy and serious, continued effort at healing the underlying stuff. I am so sorry for the people around me who have to deal with it. :-(