I'm feeling OK, carrying laundry back to the house in the dark, when your words come to me again, echoing through my mind...."still would not be...." and I spiral down into the same old pain, all over again. And I am left raw and hollow and aching.

All I know, as I trudge back for another load to carry home, is that I don't ever want to let anyone near me again. How could I have been so foolish? No, I don't ever want to love again. Just no.